Hidden Nook
"Because in Cyberspace, no one can hear you scream."
Tuesday, July 06, 2004
Loyalty verses Integrity...
So...which is more important?
Today I talked to a friend of mine (I'll keep her name anonymous)and she was talking about how the biggest thing that a relative of hers struggled with was loyalty verses integrity. I found that is also my biggest thing as well (I think the Daysman spoke through her so...it was like...wake up Hidden Nook!)
I think...and I will be honest here...I often choose loyalty over integrity because I value relationships extremely. And I realize that is a problem. I find that the friends that I am most loyal to are not the ones I spend time with, or the ones that buy the most stuff for me...or even the ones who do amazing things for my life. The friends that I value most are those who have "golden apples" to share with me. Words of value, regardless of the length of time. I think I value quality conversation (not to be confused with quality time if you have read the five love languages) more than anything else. That is why I often drift towards those friendships who either inspire me on towards life or push me into the Daysman's hands...I love them and would (if necessary) suffer hurt for them. They are dear to me and even if they never see me again, I will always value them in my heart.
Now...as my struggle with loyalty goes...I will explain it with an example. Well, I promised a friend of mine that I would go to a party to celebrate one of my "acquaintances" who had impacted my life (as in someone I did not know very well but who spoke "golden apples," not a girl friend). I had promised this person that I would be there...but later on I realized that I had accountability with my guy friends. Now, I love my guy friends very much and love spending time with them...but ironically I knew the conflict in schedule and without much struggle chose to go to the party to show appreciation to someone who had impacted my life (despite the fact I had sworn in the begining of the year to make accountability a priority over everything). Loyalty over integrity. It is something the Daysman pointed out to me as my greatest and weakest attribute. Now my dilema is trying to fix it...sometimes I wish I was a robot and could just get an "upgrade." You know what I mean? Selah.
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An upgrade - wouldn't that be cozy? *sigh* If we could all get upgrades, I would be in the shop for a while. And while I'm at it, can you jsut erase the memory bank and let me start all over from the beginning so I can make different mistakes the second time around instead of the ones I'm living with now? *sigh* Sometimes, I wish I didn't know how to love...
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Ralikat, at
6:11 AM EDT
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By Darnell Clayton ⢠11:02 PM ⢠Email Post ⢠â¢
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